Porthos
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What langcafe member do you have most in common with?What person on this site can you relate to the most?
For me, although she is a woman, I must say it is Uriel. I find that we share very similar perspectives on things. We are of a very similar mentality, both overtly frank, and both from the same region of the U.S.
The second person who I relate to here quite a bit might be Frederik.
Third, Elaine is from the same city as me, and we are both Mexican-Americans, so we share a great deal in common between those two things.
The rest are in no specific order:
I once mistook Fab for being an arrogant French snob. As I have come to know him better through discourse, I must say that although we rarely, if ever agree on topics, I like him very much.
Benjamin is very different from me in oh so many respects, but he's only a year older than me, so we share much in common due to our age.
Loic, I like quite a bit. And his frequent use of British slang is very cute.
Pauline is like the "little sister" of langcafe for me. We disagree at times, but she is always very polite and courteous (although naively uncouth at times), and I find myself defending her often from types who aren't so understanding.
Andre is the most masculine, sport loving gay man I have ever personally known! lol.  Hi Andre. And the only South African I've ever met, aside from one Anglo- South African I knew at one of my high schools.
Tiffany, I never really see her around anymore.
Walker is a cool Swedish guy who likes the Hives, which is one of my favorite bands. He is very easy going, and is fiercely proud of his small nation like most Scandanavians.
Greg, I can't forget. I used to think he was an arrogant snob, but now that he speaks English on this site (very well I might add), I have seen that he is not. He is however, still very mysterious and more private than most of the group.
Joanne is a cool chick. She's a "Jersey Girl", haha, lol.
Deborah is like the lady "Mrs" of the group, and she is from a pimpin town, one of the best towns in the country, and home to the much loathed "San Francisco Giants".
Sander - Let's just say he and I tend to disagree on a habitual basis and go about things rather differently in our approach and tactfullness.
Patrick - I don't really know that well to make an opinion of.
KSa - I always knew you were a man, dude! Never doubted it for a second. Kudos to me!
Julian - He's named after one of my favorite Roman Emperors, but I don't know much else about him.
The rest of you, I apologize for not including, but I haven't the time at the moment.
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Uriel
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What person on this site can you relate to the most?
| Quote: | | For me, although she is a woman, I must say it is Uriel. I find that we share very similar perspectives on things. We are of a very similar mentality, both overtly frank, and both from the same region of the U.S. |
Well, great minds think alike .... 
I think over the last couple years (gosh, has it been that long?!) I've found that Andre and I are the most alike in opinions and temperament. And our taste in men, of course! 
| Quote: | | The second person who I relate to here quite a bit might be Frederik. |
Who has warmed up quite a bit here on Version 2.0. he used to be a little chillier on the old Langcafe. Now it's easier to see his personality come through.
| Quote: | | Third, Elaine is from the same city as me, and we are both Mexican-Americans, so we share a great deal in common between those two things. |
Oh, you wish you could be all up in tha -- I mean, yes, she's a lovely person.
The rest are in no specific order:
| Quote: | | I once mistook Fab for being an arrogant French snob. As I have come to know him better through discourse, I must say that although we rarely, if ever agree on topics, I like him very much. |
He's never struck me as an arrogant snob of any stripe. More like very earnest and reasonable and honestly curious. And France is still in Northern Europe.  (just kidding, fab!)
| Quote: | | Benjamin is very different from me in oh so many respects, but he's only a year older than me, so we share much in common due to our age. |
More than you probably think.
| Quote: | | Loic, I like quite a bit. And his frequent use of British slang is very cute. |
He's often a very good counterpoint to the rest of us, and his writing is always a treat to read. No idea about this cricket nonsense he keeps going off about, though.
| Quote: | | Pauline is like the "little sister" of langcafe for me. We disagree at times, but she is always very polite and courteous (although naively uncouth at times), and I find myself defending her often from types who aren't so understanding. |
She seems very nice.
| Quote: | | Andre is the most masculine, sport loving gay man I have ever personally known! lol. Hi Andre. And the only South African I've ever met, aside from one Anglo- South African I knew at one of my high schools. |
Don't forget good-looking, witty, erudite ... and you should see him cook!
| Quote: | | Tiffany, I never really see her around anymore. |
Shame, too.
| Quote: | | Walker is a cool Swedish guy who likes the Hives, which is one of my favorite bands. He is very easy going, and is fiercely proud of his small nation like most Scandanavians. |
If I were to date a Swede, it'd be Walker.
| Quote: | | Greg, I can't forget. I used to think he was an arrogant snob, but now that he speaks English on this site (very well I might add), I have seen that he is not. He is however, still very mysterious and more private than most of the group. |
Do you sometimes vaguely picture him with a black cape and a fedora, too?
| Quote: | | Joanne is a cool chick. She's a "Jersey Girl", haha, lol. |
She is way cool. I flat-out LOOOVE reading her posts! Sometimes I laugh out loud!
| Quote: | | Deborah is like the lady "Mrs" of the group, and she is from a pimpin town, one of the best towns in the country, and home to the much loathed "San Francisco Giants". |
And the only Langcafeino I've ever met in person. A very, very interesting woman! But I think she's a little more the subversive type than the den mother type.
| Quote: | | Sander - Let's just say he and I tend to disagree on a habitual basis and go about things rather differently in our approach and tactfullness. |
Sander and tact in the same sentence? Heheheheheee!
| Quote: | | Patrick - I don't really know that well to make an opinion of. |
Like a much slyer version of Andre.
| Quote: | | KSa - I always knew you were a man, dude! Never doubted it for a second. Kudos to me! |
Me, too. I knew!
| Quote: | | Julian - He's named after one of my favorite Roman Emperors, but I don't know much else about him. |
One word: HOT! You need to put that picture back up, Julian, so Andre and I can drool all over our keyboards again! (Okay, you may not be able to appreciate it from our point of view, Porthos, but lemme tell ya...)
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Deborah
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| Uriel wrote: | | Quote: | | Deborah is like the lady "Mrs" of the group, and she is from a pimpin town, one of the best towns in the country, and home to the much loathed "San Francisco Giants". |
And the only Langcafeino I've ever met in person. A very, very interesting woman! But I think she's a little more the subversive type than the den mother type. |
Thank God, someone understands me!
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Julian
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| Uriel wrote: | | A very, very interesting woman! But I think she's a little more the subversive type than the den mother type. |
I kind of got that impression about her too.
| Quote: | | One word: HOT! You need to put that picture back up, Julian, so Andre and I can drool all over our keyboards again! (Okay, you may not be able to appreciate it from our point of view, Porthos, but lemme tell ya...) |
Aw shucks.  If Andre wants to see that picture again he can PM me to negotiate a fee, or better yet he can just give me his credit card info. 
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Loic
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Sounds interesting. I'll play along!
Political convictions apart, I think there are quite a few people here whom I would have no problems in striking a spontaneous conversation without descending into uncomfortable 'ermms..' and 'ahhs..' if we ever find ourselves trapped in a lift.
Andre: I can always rely on him to talk about cricket. To tell me about South Africa.
Benjamin: I think we can spend hours just talking about religion alone. Seems like an awfully good bloke.
Ksa: I think he and I are probably of the same socio-cultural complexion.
Uriel: I know I do not have take the initiative to say hi if we are alone in a lift. Uriel seems to have a very outgoing disposition that can easily put a stranger at ease.
As for the rest, do know that I might feel a little shy, embarrassed or awkward if we were having a private tete-a-tete. I suppose everyone has their moments when they are self-conscious.
Porthos: I suppose talking about girls would be a good starting point.
Pauline: Seems a little naive at times. A sort of innocence that I mourn for, really.
Elaine: I suppose I always get awkward in the presence of pretty girls.
Deborah: Although I have no qualms calling her Deborah here, I'd really feel uncomfortable being on a first name basis with her in real life.
Julian: Good looking bloke. Would never go to pick up girls in a club with him.
Sander: I like him. Along with Andre, he was one of the first people I knew. I just don't know him well enough.
Harreyns: A jolly good fellow as well. Apart from his Scandivanian obsession, I also don't know him well enough.
Walker: Very agreeable bloke. I suppose I would be able to converse freely with him as well.
Fredrik: Since he has mentioned that he weighs over 100 kg, I think of WWE wrestlers whenever he is mentioned. I hope he hasn't watched the Rock or the Undertaker back when they were in their prime; don't really fancy being at the receiving end of a choke slam or a 'people's elbow'.
Joanne: What I said about Uriel, I can also say for Joanne. The only caveat is that Joanne is more private than Uriel so I know her less well.
Patriccke: I think I knew him better in the old Langcafe when he was more active. I still remembered the help he gave me when I asked him to correct my English-French translations. Just to let you know that I still remember it so cheers, mate.
Tiffany: I hope she is not just a flash in the pan and that she'd return soon. She adds value to the forum.
Fab: Il a l'air sympathique. It's a little disappointing that he doesn't seem too interested in football, though.
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Julian
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| loic wrote: | | Uriel: I know I do not have take the initiative to say hi if we are alone in a lift. Uriel seems to have a very outgoing disposition that can easily put a stranger at ease. |
I see Uriel as the type of girl who would lead me down the wrong path if I were to work with her. I'm alluding to the old Langcafé secret sex forum. Whatever happened to that married co-worker, Uriel?
| Quote: | | Elaine: I suppose I always get awkward in the presence of pretty girls. |
If Elaine is okay with me mentioning it, I've hung out with her a few times, and she really is a stunning and charismatic person. 
| Quote: | | Julian: Good looking bloke. Would never go to pick up girls in a club with him. |
All you have to do is tell me who you're interested in, and I swear I won't pay any attention to them.
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Uriel
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| Quote: | | Julian wrote: | | loic wrote: | | Uriel: I know I do not have take the initiative to say hi if we are alone in a lift. Uriel seems to have a very outgoing disposition that can easily put a stranger at ease. |
I see Uriel as the type of girl who would lead me down the wrong path if I were to work with her. I'm alluding to the old Langcafé secret sex forum. Whatever happened to that married co-worker, Uriel? |
Ooh, you are bad, Julian! Do we need to set up another secret forum again?
| Quote: | | Quote: | | Elaine: I suppose I always get awkward in the presence of pretty girls. |
If Elaine is okay with me mentioning it, I've hung out with her a few times, and she really is a stunning and charismatic person. |
I bet she is! I'm jealous.
| Quote: | | Quote: | | Julian: Good looking bloke. Would never go to pick up girls in a club with him. |
All you have to do is tell me who you're interested in, and I swear I won't pay any attention to them. |
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Hey, everybody needs a wingman, right?
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Pauline
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| loic wrote: |
Pauline: Seems a little naive at times. A sort of innocence that I mourn for, really. |
How I'm naive, what exactly you mean ? Porthos finds this also. Can you explain me what I write what make you to think this ? Maybe because I'm very honest, and I tell for exemple some things about me what usually people don't never tell ? It's because i think it's horrible people must feel shame for something not their fault, it's why i find it courageous and good that Bejnamin tells about him also. But, in life not on the forum, I say not much at all !!
I find very difficult say about people, because only here I talk with someone, mostly I dont' have converstaions. The people I think I can have a converstaion wiht : Porthos, benjamin, deborah, Greg, Harrenys, Tiorthan, Aquatar, André, Jo, fredrik and other people as well
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David
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I would probably say Greg.
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Benjamin [inactive]
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| loic wrote: | | Benjamin: I think we can spend hours just talking about religion alone. Seems like an awfully good bloke. |
Thank you!
I'm not sure if I could name one person here with whom I can relate the best, so I'm going to comment on various people, as the rest of you have done.
Deborah — although we probably have rather different lives, you seem to have a fairly similar 'worldview' to me. It would appear that we share similar political and social attitudes.
Loic — completely the opposite from me politically, although I always enjoy talking to you and you seems like a decent sort of person. It's interesting for me to talk about issues relating to education with you as well, because the school systems in England and Singapore are almost the same.
Uriel — seems like a rather lively, fun and intelligent sort of person. Also one of the first people I came to know.
André — watches over us all with his fatherly gaze; I like it when you tell me and others about South Africa (I love Afrikaans as well).
Fab — makes a lot of maps showing information about Europe, which I do as well. I'd expect that you've also memorised the populations and GDP per-capita of almost every country in Europe, as I also have.
Porthos — seems like a nice, down-to-earth and intelligent sort of person who probably has quite a different sort of life to mine in many ways, but there would probably also be some similarities as you're about the same age as me. I imagine you to be a very outgoing to sort of person, and although I haven't really seen a proper picture of you, I get the impression that you're quite 'fit' (i.e. rather attractive) as well. I also imagine you to be the sort of person who is totally confident about taking your shirt off outside in public, which I'd expect you to do quite a lot since you live in California and, at least according to what you've told us, have a rather nice torso since you're a swimmer. Am I right?
(Sorry, I should explain — for some reason, I have a kind of non-sexual fascination with shirtlessness amongst teenage boys and the whole psychology of it, even though it is not an activity which I have ever had the confidence to engage in myself. And although I'm asexual, that doesn't mean that I don't think 'that person is attractive' — just not in a sexual way).
Fredrik — seems to know a lot about Northern Europe on the whole, and always presents it in a very amusing sort of way.
Pauline — seems like a nice sort of person. I'm actually very impressed with the way you've learnt so much English in such a short time (ignore Sander).
Sander — sometimes you're a perfectly nice, reasonable and funny sort of person, whilst at other times you seem borderline psycho. You're probably not all that different from me, actually.
Greg — I don't remember his name, but you remind me a lot of this fairly well-known Spanish historian who lives in England. He's Spanish, he has a Spanish name, he looks very typically 'Spanish', he behaves like an upper-class English gentleman, he speaks perfect Received Pronunciation, he's fiercely intelligent, he's openly homosexual and he's also a very right-wing Tory (member of the Conservative Party). Essentially, he's one of those 'irritating' people whose purpose seems to be to try and 'irritate' as many people as possible through his paradoxical existence and general mysteriousness.
Walker — as other have said, a very aggreable sort of person. I don't think I'd have any difficulty talking with you either.
KSa — I find it more difficult to relate to you than to most other people here because your conservative outlook is essentially the opposite of mine. I like Poland though.
Elaine and Joanne — I never seem to have had a conversation with either of you, for some reason. Same goes for Patricke, Julian, and Harreyns, whom I also don't seem to know well enough.
There are of course other people form the old LangCafé whom we don't see anymore. I'd really like Candy to come back, but she doesn't seem to go to Antimoon either now.
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André in Zuid-Afrika
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Hm, I guess it's my turn...
In no particular order...
My girlfriends, Elaine, Uriel and Deborah!  
Sander - my fiery Dutch friend, I've known him since when I still posted on Antimoon. Sometimes he makes me bedonnerd, but mostly I enjoy his posts! And I can speak Afrikaans to him!
Walker - a great and sweet guy, the kind of persons I would like to count amongst my friends.
Benjamin - we got off to a bit of a bad start, but I've grown quite fond of our redhead Englishman who doesn't want to be English . And he's interested in SA and Afrikaans, always a good characteristic in a person, I feel.
Loic - Always enjoy reading his posts, the cricket discussions, and even our occasional (amicable) disagreements. And he reads PG Wodehouse!
Greg - Somewhat secretive, but one of the nicest people here!
KSa - Like him a lot, and feel some connection with him since we're both from countries which recently underwent major changes.
Fredrik - Glad that he's posting more, only really getting to know him now. Seems all Scandinavian guys are gentle and sweet.
Joanne - I'm considering strongly to add her to my group of girlfriends!
Julian - he's beautiful, witty, intelligent, gorgeous, a nice guy, interesting, a hunk, confidant and sensitive. Oh, have I mentioned that he's very handsome? 
David - a nice guy, whose IT expertise I've been exploiting on this forum.
Porthos - Our very talkative newcomer! Glad I could change your impression of gay men! Love your enthusiasm!
Pauline - Very enthusiastic as well, and stop worrying about what we think of you, we actually like you!
Fab - Don't really know him well, we don't seem to share similar interests, but seems a very nice guy... and he's cute...
Pattriccke - Really miss him around he now that he seldom posts... 
Tiffany - I hope she returns soon!
And I really miss Frances and Joel, our friends from Down Under, who disappeared even before the old forum did.
And of course Kirk, who's disappeared as well, not even to mention Yann...
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Pauline
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| Porthos wrote: | | Pauline is like the "little sister" of langcafe for me. We disagree at times, but she is always very polite and courteous (although naively uncouth at times), and I find myself defending her often from types who aren't so understanding. |
Little sister LOL !! Now I have a big brother and big sister for defend me
porthos, i think that you are a very nice person ; honest, kind, funny, intelligent etc...I'm happy you are my ' big brother '
I've discovered , that there's someone with (of ? has ?) similar age as me : David. But, we didn't met yet ; I've read he put 15 on fab's age thread.
| Benjamin wrote: | | Pauline — seems like a nice sort of person. I'm actually very impressed with the way you've learnt so much English in such a short time (ignore Sander). |
Thanks I was *very* impressed when I've read your french. My english will improve for sure ; when I will be 18, I will fluently speak it I hope.It's easier for me learn dutch and german, because I can listen those languages and know some people who speak them.
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Benjamin [inactive]
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Morbid curiosity is making me want to see a picture of Julian — perhaps I've seen it before, but I don't seem to remember it. What I do remember though is that there was once a rather attractive boy from Québec who was about the same age as me on the old LangCafé.
| Pauline wrote: | | I was *very* impressed when I've read your french. |
Thank you! :) It seems to me that you've learnt most of the English vocabulary that you'll need most of the time — now you should focus on the grammar!
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Sander
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Well ... since everyone is doing it:
Deborah -- An Antimoon veteran, former ballet dancer and San Franciscan. When I think of her, I have 2 somewhat different views ... the first one is that of an exentric older woman who has "seen (at least a part of) the world", while the other is more bluecollarish and mainly based on her "lunchbreak/coworker" excerpts. At first I thought she was Jewish, because of her name, but through the stories about her childhood I now have a more "hippie"-ish picture of her.
Walker -- A very "regular/normal" kind of guy. I like him, even though I vaguely remember him to be a chuck norris fan , I think we share a great deal of interests.
Benjamin -- There exists this stereotype of the self-hating jew, well forget that and go meet the self-hating Englishman! At first, well to be honest still a bit actually, I thought he was somewhat weird. Not drinking beer, asexuality, boys school, etc. He's not the kind of guy you can dislike easily, you might find him a bit quaint but that's about it.
Loic -- The most civilized bloke on board. The stereotypical Englishmen live in Singapore, not London chaps! Furthermore he likes (Dutch) soccer which is good because, as I couldn't care less about rugby or cricket, means he's one of the few people who share an intrest in the only real sport in this world. Nice, I envy his selfcontrol and choice of words.
KSa -- Good discussions, my ideal "opponant" when it comes to gay marriage, drugs or euthanasia. A mutual interest in history and somehow the fact that he's a Pole fascinates me.
Fredrik -- A true gentil intellectual. His futile attempts to get the Antimoon trolls to read Thomas Mann books are the perfect illustration. Similar interest in history, and a similar amount of imagination.
André -- I always hated André, even since we met on Antimoon I found him to be a rascist farmer. 
Nah, André is great. The way we gossip about all the other members and secretly runn this forum ... The way he sends me a PM in which he says how much he missed having an argument with me apart from that, he's a great guy and probably (together with deborah and Ksa) the person with the most life experience.
Julian -- Artistic, his avatars I think he did an independant film too, the girls and andré love him, how can I stay behind?
David -- A bit of the silent IT force behind the forum. When he first showed up I was a bit sceptic on his ... eh, assertiveness but he proved me to be totally wrong.
Porthos -- Young, very talkative American. Has kind of a fix on stereotypes and, like a good friend once said, has so much to learn even though he pretends or is convinced he knows it all already. It's kind of cute but sometimes it can get really irritating, if there's one thing that can piss me off it's Porthos starting another " [...] Germanic/Latin [...]" thread. I don't really dislike him though.
Fab - Don't really know him and I guess never really wanted to either. I always thought and still kind of think of him as a moderate Antimoon troll. His posts/maps on Germanic/Latin subjects just don't or barely interest me.
Elaine -- The kind of person who would stop her white BMW to pick up lost deep-voiced Dutchmen No one can dislike her
Pattriccke -- Really would like him to post more ... he always manages to
fascinate me.
Tiffany - Smart and nice, I hope she starts posting here again.
[/quote]
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André in Zuid-Afrika
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| Sander wrote: |
André -- I always hated André, even since we met on Antimoon I found him to be a rascist farmer.
Nah, André is great. The way we gossip about all the other members and secretly runn this forum ... The way he sends me a PM in which he says how much he missed having an argument with me apart from that, he's a great guy and probably (together with deborah and Ksa) the person with the most life experience.
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Hm, remember the racist farmer thing....  But you've learned!! And I do miss those arguments! 
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Pauline
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I find this thread is mean. It's not nice disussing people and criticise them. I think, that Porthos didn't anticipated there would be so much nasty comments. Also, we don't know sufficient of each other and it's wrong to be so judgemental. It's just a bitchy thread now.
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André in Zuid-Afrika
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| Pauline wrote: | | I find this thread is mean. It's not nice disussing people and criticise them. I think, that Porthos didn't anticipated there would be so much nasty comments. Also, we don't know sufficient of each other and it's wrong to be so judgemental. It's just a bitchy thread now. |
I don't think so.  Nobody's been bitchy so far.
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André in Zuid-Afrika
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| Pauline wrote: | | DELETED BY ANDRé |
Pauline, please read my earlier post in this thread regarding you and Sander. You are now banned from this forum for a week.
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Porthos
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I don't want this to get heated. There's no reason we can't have a perfectly innocent discussion about the people here, or at least the personalities which they project on langcafe, whether that is truly indicative of their true persons.
If you want to know a little about the real me, here it is in a blurb:
My nickname is "fancypants". I am *extremely* outgoing and overflowing with confidence. I appear cocky to most who don't know me that well, but I wouldn't say I'm arrogant, for although I think a lot of myself, I do not look down on others. I'm very nice and gregarious, and the perfect refined gentleman, but I'm also a wild party animal. I chose Porthos for my name on this site because I felt I was personified in his image. I'm a Californian, surfer dude, who loves a good time and the ladies, and very metrosexual. I've also been in quite a few fistfights, and I have a temper, or what I like to call, a strong sense of justice. I respect people from all walks of life, and I'm just about the cheeriest, nicest guy you'll meet. I am very blunt, at times almost too much. I have my whacky, playboy side, while when appropriate, I'm very mature. I read the Wall Street Journal and I monitor stocks. I invest my small wages in the market, and I intend on being a trader at an investment bank. I'm a playboy who doesn't like to be tied down, and I act like I'm not close to anybody, but I am secretly very sentimental, and I really have a soft spot, but I don't let anybody see that side of me. And that's just a few things you need to know.
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Benjamin [inactive]
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So, would you say that your extreme level of overt confidence is genuine, or is it a way of hiding secret insecurities? I'm not judging you here; I'm genuinely interested in what you think.
I'm never quite sure whether I'm a confident person or not. On the one hand, I'm reasonably quiet — I won't be the first to go and talk to people and I've never been particularly keen on making oral contributions in lessons at school — I'm definitely an introvert. But on the other hand, I was more than happy to go to Germany on my own this summer for two weeks to stay with people I've never met before, knowing very little German (I somehow 'managed' to speak German all the time whilst I was there).
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Loic
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Porthos: Very good description of yourself. You could recycle it for a dating advert, really.
Pauline: You strike me as naive, but in a positive way. I suppose you hit the nail in the head when you suggested that you might be too outspoken. Also, I think you might be a tad sensitive, but I'd advise you not to worry too much about it.
Maturity comes with age.
Actually, I must say that I am not too mad about rugby. Maybe I should correct this impression now lest it snowballs and becomes an integral part of how others perceive me. I do know quite a little bit as a few of my friends are 'ruggers' and I've watched rugby seven matches before, not to mention the occasional Test matches on the telly. But I can name you a host of other recreational activities that take precedence over rugby in my life: football, cricket, squash, tennis, table-tennis, golf, etc, etc.
Another thing: I noticed that Sander and Benjamin associate me with 'Britishness'. Is it my fondness for cricket, the supposedly archetypal English sport? In Singapore, cricket is seen as a stereotypically Indian sport.
As for 'British slang', most Singaporeans also use them without being cognisant of the fact that they are exclusive to the British Isles. I noticed Andre saying 'cock-up' in another thread and he mentioning that the word also enjoys widespread currency in his country. We also say 'cock up' here very often. Many of us also use 'bloody hell' as a milder form of expletive.
We don't say 'blimey', of course. Unless he is trying to be a poseur.
Standard Singapore English is largely similar to standard British English in its written form so I can see why I am misunderstood as having an extreme predilection for the Queen's English. But if you were to hear us speak, there are definitely no similarities beyond perhaps, similar pronunciations for certain words. Our cadence is an entirely different kettle of fish.
Such informal appraisals are always very interesting. We get to see how we are perceived. It is always a hoot to realise the incongruence between our true personalities and our surface characters.
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Porthos
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| Benjamin wrote: | So, would you say that your extreme level of overt confidence is genuine, or is it a way of hiding secret insecurities? I'm not judging you here; I'm genuinely interested in what you think.
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No, honestly, it's just because I'm very outgoing naturally and a very sociable creature. And I like making me people laugh, and I like having a good time. And on top of that, I'm the last person you will think of with the word "shy". To sum it up, I'm very vivacious. I don't mind your question. I would have asked myself that same question if I were you.
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Uriel
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| Quote: | | So, would you say that your extreme level of overt confidence is genuine, or is it a way of hiding secret insecurities? |
Must be a little bit of a cultural gap there. I don't find Porthos's manner extreme at all. He seems pretty average in that respect to me. But then, I've noticed that what we find friendly and outgoing and gregarious often comes off as brash or pushy to many Europeans.
| Quote: | Standard Singapore English is largely similar to standard British English in its written form so I can see why I am misunderstood as having an extreme predilection for the Queen's English. But if you were to hear us speak, there are definitely no similarities beyond perhaps, similar pronunciations for certain words. Our cadence is an entirely different kettle of fish.
Such informal appraisals are always very interesting. We get to see how we are perceived. It is always a hoot to realise the incongruence between our true personalities and our surface characters. |
I'd love to hear you talk, because all this time I've been picturing perfect RP when I read your posts! (Well, as much as I can without actually mentally faking one in my head -- but although of course I "read" all posts in my own American accent, yours is the one that fits least naturally into my own speaking rhythm and style -- it's the one that least "fits" my dialect, I suppose. Not that there's anything unnatrual or awkward about the way you write -- it's beautiful prose. But it's in that that I can see the true range of dialectical differences. With Benjamin, it's usually more that I'll notice the occasional intrusion of a word like "whilst"; nothing else really overtly sets his posts apart from an American's.
And honestly, not only do you come off as overtly British, but overtly British from a bygone time -- like you've stepped out of a Jane Austen novel!
But of course, those are the perceptions of someone unfamiliar with Singapore and only vaguely familiar with the British -- and it's not only interesting to see how others perceive us, as you say, but to realize the limitations of one's own limitations and cultural stereotypes -- you learn a little about yourself as well.
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Uriel
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| Quote: | | I'm never quite sure whether I'm a confident person or not. On the one hand, I'm reasonably quiet — I won't be the first to go and talk to people and I've never been particularly keen on making oral contributions in lessons at school — I'm definitely an introvert. But on the other hand, I was more than happy to go to Germany on my own this summer for two weeks to stay with people I've never met before, knowing very little German (I somehow 'managed' to speak German all the time whilst I was there). |
Confidence takes many forms. Quiet confidence is what it sounds like you have -- very centered, with inner poise. You know who you are. Being vocally assertive in class is simply not who you are, and you don't try to be that person. But that's not the same as being shy or insecure or unsure of yourself.
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Uriel
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| Quote: | | (Sorry, I should explain — for some reason, I have a kind of non-sexual fascination with shirtlessness amongst teenage boys and the whole psychology of it, even though it is not an activity which I have ever had the confidence to engage in myself. And although I'm asexual, that doesn't mean that I don't think 'that person is attractive' — just not in a sexual way). |
It's not strange at all -- I find the nude female form very fascinating in the same way. I would rather see a picture or a painting of a naked woman than a naked man any day. When I was an art student, although I enjoyed seeing naked male models for the titillation factor (and the fact that it was a treat, because they were much rarer), I derived much more enjoyment from actually drawing the female models. I would say that I find it beautiful in the same way that I find a flower or a horse beautiful, but because it is a human form, there is always another psychological level to it that isn't there with a plant or an animal, and because of the place that nudity has in our (mostly clothed) culture, there is always an undercurrent of sexuality there as well. But I did not find myself attracted to them sexually -- it was more that I identified with that aspect as a fellow female.
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KSa
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[quote="Sander"]
| Quote: | KSa -- Good discussions, my ideal "opponant" when it comes to gay marriage, drugs or euthanasia. A mutual interest in history and somehow the fact that he's a Pole fascinates me.
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Well, I think the most interesting discussions are still to come
| Quote: | | André -- I always hated André, even since we met on Antimoon I found him to be a rascist farmer. |
I know you were joking but I somehow feel that a deeply-rooted stereotype of a "bad-rascist-white-farmer-in-Africa" still exists, while the events of the last years have been proving otherwise: white farmers deprived of their property and/or brutally killed (Zimbabwe, South Africa).
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Benjamin [inactive]
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| loic wrote: | | Another thing: I noticed that Sander and Benjamin associate me with 'Britishness'. Is it my fondness for cricket, the supposedly archetypal English sport? |
To some extent, yes — I associate cricket mainly with upper-middle class and upper class English people. And also my grandfather, who incidentally is the chairman of the International Council of Cricket Societies — somehow, I managed not to be interested in cricket at all.
The style of your written language is also a factor. As Uriel described, it's a bit like reading something by Jane Austin — but perhaps that's just what written Singapore English is like. Like Uriel, I tend to read most things here in my own accent (RP) — Porthos' writing fits the worst with this, whilst yours fits the best. Actually, I often imagine you speaking U-RP, even though you probably speak with a Singaporean accent in reality.
| Uriel wrote: | | Must be a little bit of a cultural gap there. I don't find Porthos's manner extreme at all. He seems pretty average in that respect to me. But then, I've noticed that what we find friendly and outgoing and gregarious often comes off as brash or pushy to many Europeans. |
That might be it. Actually, the image I have of Porthos is one of a very 'Californian' sort of person. Someone who smiles all the time, likes spending a lot of time outside doing sporty activities in warm sunshine, is very forward and overtly friendly, talks a lot in a rather loud and enthusiastic fashion, gets a lot of attention from girls and likes snogging them in a rather public way... there's nothing wrong with any of that — actually, I think it's good. But it wouldn't fit very well into middle-class England.
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Uriel
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| Quote: | | Actually, the image I have of Porthos is one of a very 'Californian' sort of person. Someone who smiles all the time, likes spending a lot of time outside doing sporty activities in warm sunshine, is very forward and overtly friendly, talks a lot in a rather loud and enthusiastic fashion, gets a lot of attention from girls and likes snogging them in a rather public way... there's nothing wrong with any of that — actually, I think it's good. But it wouldn't fit very well into middle-class England. |
Keep me out of middle-class England then, because all of the above sounds like a pretty good time to me!
No snogging in public, eh? What would a bar be without two or three couples who need to get a room expressing their fondness/drunkenness/late-night desperation in front of God and everyone? Not that I've EVER done such a thing myself (cough) .... in the last few weeks, at least.
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Benjamin [inactive]
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| Uriel wrote: | | No snogging in public, eh? What would a bar be without two or three couples who need to get a room expressing their fondness/drunkenness/late-night desperation in front of God and everyone? Not that I've EVER done such a thing myself (cough) .... in the last few weeks, at least. |
Oh no, people do snog in public here — I just mentioned it because it's something that I imagine Josh doing rather a lot.
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Porthos
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| Quote: | | That might be it. Actually, the image I have of Porthos is one of a very 'Californian' sort of person. Someone who smiles all the time, likes spending a lot of time outside doing sporty activities in warm sunshine, is very forward and overtly friendly, talks a lot in a rather loud and enthusiastic fashion, gets a lot of attention from girls and likes snogging them in a rather public way... there's nothing wrong with any of that — actually, I think it's good. But it wouldn't fit very well into middle-class England. |
Well, I must say good chap, that that is a smashing good impression of me indeed, what what? No, for real, that is exactly how I am. Very good personal analysis there Ben.
To give you an even greater perspective, you might want to imagine me doing things like the following, which I do on a regular basis.
I have fake seizures in public places all of the time (it's so freakin awesome)
I tell everyone I meet that my name is "Bob".
I run around shopping malls like the Knights of the roundtable from Monty Python's "Search for the Holy Grail", where I act like I'm riding a horse, while my friend is behind me clapping two coconut shells together, which is supposed to simulate the sounds of the horse's hooves clamping on the ground.
I sing spontaneously, no matter where I'm at, and I don't have a very nice singing voice either.
I build fake cardboard cars, and walk under them, and use them for fast food drive-thrus.
And I get slapped by at least one girl every weekend.
Yeah, those are just a couple of things that I do for kicks on a regular basis.
| Quote: | | Like Uriel, I tend to read most things here in my own accent (RP) — Porthos' writing fits the worst with this |
Why does mine fit the worst?
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Benjamin [inactive]
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| Porthos wrote: | | And I get slapped by at least one girl every weekend. |
Is the term 'to get slapped by' a slang term for 'to have sex with' (or something else), or do you mean that the girls literally hit you on your face with their hands?
| Quote: | | Why does mine fit the worst? |
Because you (and Uriel, as well) write in a more American style, whilst some other members use a more 'international' form of English.
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Porthos
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| Quote: | | Is the term 'to get slapped by' a slang term for 'to have sex with' (or something else), or do you mean that the girls literally hit you on your face with their hands? |
Lol. Well in this case, I meant literally being slapped in the face. In most cases, it's because I'm a little too, shall we call it "direct"?
| Quote: | | Because you (and Uriel, as well) write in a more American style, whilst some other members use a more 'international' form of English. |
Really? Give me some examples. If you met me in person, it would even worse, because I use a lot of Spanish slang all of the time.
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Benjamin [inactive]
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| Porthos wrote: | | Quote: | | Is the term 'to get slapped by' a slang term for 'to have sex with' (or something else), or do you mean that the girls literally hit you on your face with their hands? |
Lol. Well in this case, I meant literally being slapped in the face. In most cases, it's because I'm a little too, shall we call it "direct"? |
Something tells me that my non-literal interpretation probably applies as well though, lol.
Just of interest... do 16-year-old boys tend to discuss their activities with girls with their mothers? I know this probably sounds stupid, but I really have no idea.
| Quote: | | Really? Give me some examples. If you met me in person, it would even worse, because I use a lot of Spanish slang all of the time. |
I don't think I can. It's just that your posts seem to read 'American-style', somehow.
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Porthos
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No, I would never discuss anything about girls with my mother. Ever.
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Benjamin [inactive]
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So she essentially has no idea what you get up to at the weekend?
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Porthos
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Bingo.
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Joanne
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Pssh...that's what you think. One day, when you're thirty-five or thereabouts, when your wife has just given birth to your second child, she's going to say something like, "Mijito, remember when you were sixteen, and you used to prance around the mall with coconuts and girls slapped the Jesus out of you? Honey, I thought my family line was gonna die with you!" You're going to say, "But how did you--" and you're not even going to finish that sentence because your mom's gonna give you that "I'm your Mom, how'd you think you were going to live under my roof rent-free without me knowing everything you ever did?" look. Moms know everything, man. They know. I ain't lyin'...
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Benjamin [inactive]
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So Josh, your high level of confidence and outgoingness doesn't extend to bringing girls home and snogging them in the presence of your mother/family then?
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Porthos
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| Benjamin wrote: | | So Josh, your high level of confidence and outgoingness doesn't extend to bringing girls home and snogging them in the presence of your mother/family then? |
Oh, no. Definitely not. That part of me comes out outside of the home.
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Sander
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| Benjamin wrote: | | So Josh, your high level of confidence and outgoingness doesn't extend to bringing girls home and snogging them in the presence of your mother/family then? |
This might have to do with the "quality" of the earlier mentioned girls
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Porthos
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Oh, no Sander. We're talking about me here, remember?
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Sander
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| Porthos wrote: | | Oh, no Sander. We're talking about me here, remember? |
I know, hence the remark.
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André in Zuid-Afrika
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BTW, I miss Losseh around here. He hasn't posted in quite a while.
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Elaine
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| Sander wrote: | | Elaine -- The kind of person who would stop her white BMW to pick up lost deep-voiced Dutchmen No one can dislike her |
Hahaha! Just so you all don't get the wrong idea about me, I only pick up the cute ones.
| Loic wrote: | | Elaine: I suppose I always get awkward in the presence of pretty girls. |
Oh how sweet!
| Julian wrote: | | If Elaine is okay with me mentioning it, I've hung out with her a few times, and she really is a stunning and charismatic person. |
Yeah, I guess it's okay to mention it.  But thank you! I must say the same about you.
Can I tell y'all a little story about Julian? He came to my work to do lunch, so he waits out in the waiting room and the admin asst comes running to my cubicle going, "There's someone waiting out there for you and my god he's beautiful!" (I'm slightly paraphrasing here)-- "Who is he?" and I coyly reply, "Oh just a friend."   And as we head out for lunch, I notice the girls (and some of the guys) checking him out.
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Fredrik
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Porthos wrote:
| Quote: | | The second person who I relate to here quite a bit might be Frederik. |
I feel charmed; but that relation is really strange, as we are very different types of persons.
Porthos wrote:
| Quote: | | Walker is a cool Swedish guy who likes the Hives, which is one of my favorite bands. He is very easy going, and is fiercely proud of his small nation like most Scandanavians. |
Hmm, he has always struck me as extremely Swedish, i.e. almost comically modest and neutral. I don't doubt that he is proud of his country, but he shows it in a very low-key, Swedish way.
Uriel wrote:
| Quote: | | Who has warmed up quite a bit here on Version 2.0. he used to be a little chillier on the old Langcafe. Now it's easier to see his personality come through. |
Interesting that you write that! I was probably quite chilly and language-specific earlier, as I used to live in a very social dorm + was very busy socially in Germany. Now that I live all by myself with my post-exchange trauma, I more appreciate the social interaction here.
loic wrote:
| Quote: | | Fredrik: Since he has mentioned that he weighs over 100 kg, I think of WWE wrestlers whenever he is mentioned. I hope he hasn't watched the Rock or the Undertaker back when they were in their prime; don't really fancy being at the receiving end of a choke slam or a 'people's elbow'. |
LOL, don't worry, I am of a very peaceful nature!
Reading all those sensitive-natured questions from Benjamin to Josh made me think of Tonio Kröger and Hans Hanssen, one intrigued by the outlandish nature of the other and the latter by the regular nature of the other.
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Deborah
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| Elaine wrote: | | Can I tell y'all a little story about Julian? He came to my work to do lunch, so he waits out in the waiting room and the admin asst comes running to my cubicle going, "There's someone waiting out there for you and my god he's beautiful!" (I'm slightly paraphrasing here |
I suppose what s/he really said was "He has a really nice personality," right?
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fab
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It is not a specific order, but the ones I "know" (in virtual life ) most:
Porthos, alias LAA in Antimoon or Josh in real life (as far I know)
We had long endless interesting argumentation about languages, cultures, peoples and history. He seems to be a nice quite tipical (for what he says and I imagine) American teenager, very self-confident (maybe too much and it could be sometimes irritating  )... He had very fixed quite negative stereoptypes about France a few month ago, I think I tries with my discussions with him to incite him to think differently, and maybe also reversely.
Benjamin - We have the same kind of very polemic and endless topics than with Porthos. sometimes emulating positive tensions, I actually really like both of them because we can really contruct a dialectic thinkings exchanching points of views, and that mainly the purpose of an international forum. Benjamin is very smart, mature and cultured person, with very good knowledge of French. He's nice, but seems lacking self-confidence in himself and his country/culture. He makes me think a bit to myself when I was teenager, I wanted to change of country and wanted then to emigrate to Canada... I discovered that it is difficult to change you cultural identity, and learned later to love it with its positive and negative points...
Loic - Very nice and cultured person, very respectfull and interested in all cultures. He have a very good knowledge of French too.
Greg - THE specialisty of linguistics here. I agree with him on a a lot of subjects, and being both French living in Paris I think we have about the same contextual thinking.
Elaine - c'est une fille pas comme les autres...
The most beautiful girl here !... She seems to be very funny and likes play a lot (very reactive to "guess quizz" and others)..? I like it. Interested in the "serious "topic, but she seems avoiding the polemics...
Pauline - I don't know her really. she seems to be a nice and curious young Belgian girl.
Uriel, I don't know her so much. She seems curious to many things, but seems to be a bit irritated by my obssessions...
Tiffany - She was very sweet and interested in a lot of things. But I haven't see her since a long time.
And André.. the godfather !
I think I haven't had enough discussion with KSa, Fredrik, Joanne, Julian, David, Pattriccke... and the ones I forget to make a more precise idea.
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Elaine
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| fab wrote: | Elaine - c'est une fille pas comme les autres...
The most beautiful girl here !... She seems to be very funny and likes play a lot (very reactive to "guess quizz" and others)..? I like it. Interested in the "serious "topic, but she seems avoiding the polemics... |
Flatteur ! Merci vraiment, monsieur. Ah, yes polemics! I think I was more vocal on the old site, but now I'm just... s'ennuyer à mourir with politics.
Oh but you neglected to mention Deborah!
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Deborah
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| Elaine wrote: | | Oh but you neglected to mention Deborah! |
Actually, I think fab and I haven't had much interaction yet.
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Uriel
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| Quote: | | Interesting that you write that! I was probably quite chilly and language-specific earlier, as I used to live in a very social dorm + was very busy socially in Germany. Now that I live all by myself with my post-exchange trauma, I more appreciate the social interaction here. |
I remember you being almost belligerent at times -- you really didn't like a lot of things! I thought you were quite the counterpoint to Walker's laidback charm, but here you're a lot friendlier.
| Quote: | | Uriel, I don't know her so much. She seems curious to many things, but seems to be a bit irritated by my obssessions... |
Not at all, just can't keep up with it. And honestly, not being European, there's a limit to the amount of minutiae I can delve into -- you are far more qualified on that topic than I.
| Quote: | | Can I tell y'all a little story about Julian? He came to my work to do lunch, so he waits out in the waiting room and the admin asst comes running to my cubicle going, "There's someone waiting out there for you and my god he's beautiful!" (I'm slightly paraphrasing here)-- "Who is he?" and I coyly reply, "Oh just a friend." And as we head out for lunch, I notice the girls (and some of the guys) checking him out. |
Oh, that's probably just your memory playing tricks on you --blowing his rather ordinary looks all out of proportion -- right, Julian?
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Elaine
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| Uriel wrote: | | Oh, that's probably just your memory playing tricks on you --blowing his rather ordinary looks all out of proportion -- right, Julian? |
Perhaps. The memory does start to go at this age.
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Walker
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Thanks for your nice comments!
| Uriel wrote: | | If I were to date a Swede, it'd be Walker |
Hehehe! That's sweet!
| Sander wrote: | | Walker -- A very "regular/normal" kind of guy. I like him, even though I vaguely remember him to be a chuck norris fan , I think we share a great deal of interests |
You know, I take that as a compliment! Yes, my Chuck Norris avatar... a mockery I grew out of. Interests, eh? Then return to the forum, why don't you!
| Joanne wrote: | | Moms know everything, man. They know. I ain't lyin'... |
I refuse to believe that!
| Porthos wrote: | | Walker is a cool Swedish guy who likes the Hives, which is one of my favorite bands. He is very easy going, and is fiercely proud of his small nation like most Scandanavians. |
| Fredrik from Norway wrote: | | Hmm, he has always struck me as extremely Swedish, i.e. almost comically modest and neutral. I don't doubt that he is proud of his country, but he shows it in a very low-key, Swedish way. |
Fiercely proud? Comically modest? My country is crap and you will respect my authoritah!!
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Porthos
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| Quote: |
Fiercely proud? Comically modest? My country is crap and you will respect my authoritah!! |
South Park fan are you?
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Uriel
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If drinking whiskey were a paying job, your father'd be a millionaire, Kenny!
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Walker
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| Porthos wrote: | | Quote: |
Fiercely proud? Comically modest? My country is crap and you will respect my authoritah!! |
South Park fan are you? |
Yep! It doesn't run on any of the channels I have now, though. The last episode I watched was the one where Cartman starts a church and collects money from the other kids (who come to his church), money that he intends on keeping for himself. The most hilarious thing in that episode was the way Cartman spoke and behaved , you know like those crazy preachers do, adding ah' s at the end of sentences. "The Lord spoke to me, ah!" etc.
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