After Sarkozy's outburst against a mortified farmer who was afraid of shaking hands with the President of the French Republic, it got me thinking on words that have this uncanny ability of cutting us down to size. As the old adage goes, 'sticks and stones will break my bones, but names will never hurt me'. However, someone of a sensitive disposition would undoubtedly find many words to be hurtful or extremely offensive.
We human beings are a rather quarrelsome species and many of us simply love nothing better than trading insults with our best friends or enemies. My question is this: what sort of insults get your danders up? Is being called a twit enough to warrant revenge by deadly violence? Are racial epithets strictly taboo in your society?
Personally, I am innured to insults, especially if they are done in a good-natured manner. I have been called a 'poor bastard' quite a number of times (don't ask me why, though). I believe I would still be able to retain my equanimity if I am called a fucker. But to call me a cunt would probably make me go ballistic.
When I was in school, I remember that the more common epithets hurled at one another would be fag, wanker, dickhead or prick. My father would usually lambast an inconsiderate motorist as a 'bloody idiot' - he thinks it's very harsh as a term of insult, but I think that it can actually be an endearing term of insult. Oh well, one man's meat is another man's peach.
Liz
Re: Words that cut you to the quick
Loic wrote:
I believe I would still be able to retain my equanimity if I am called a fucker. But to call me a cunt would probably make me go ballistic.
Calling a man a 'cunt' in a jocular and even endearing way seems possible to me, but I would never ever use this word as an insult, neither would I apply it for a woman. It is only used for man in the UK, but as far as I know there are some people who call women that way in the States. In any case, if used as an insult, it's very very rude. As for fucker, I consider it even more insulting but probably it isn't.
Tiffany
I think the words that "get to" people say a lot about them. For example, I would probably be up in arms at any hint of a derogatory Asian word: 'chink', 'gook' what have you. I would be particularly inflamed to hear a derogatory word aimed specifically at Asian females.
This is probably because I see myself as an Asian-American, though my history is mixed.
Probably one of the worst would be 'sellout' - I am married to an Italian man and though I have no doubt that superficial fetish-based relationships between white males and asian females exist, judging people on sight alone is just prejudice. Ok, that discussion is not really meant for this topic...
But I think it says a lot about me...
Ok, I'm going to stop now.
Deborah
I think the only time (since I was a kid) that I was bothered by what someone called me was the first time I was called old. I was leaving a class I was taking in the company of a woman in her 20s, when a drunk guy started obnoxiously coming on to this woman. She tried unsuccessfully to discourage him, then looked pleadingly at me, so I told him to leave her alone. He looked me up and down and told me to mind my own business. He said, "I'm not talkin' to you, bitch -- you're old!" It did bother me for about one second to realize that I'd reached the "old" category. But then I decided to play it for what it was worth and told the asshole to get away from my daughter, which worked. Ah, the power of motherhood, even faked motherhood!
Elaine
Re: Words that cut you to the quick
Liz wrote:
Loic wrote:
I believe I would still be able to retain my equanimity if I am called a fucker. But to call me a cunt would probably make me go ballistic.
Calling a man a 'cunt' in a jocular and even endearing way seems possible to me, but I would never ever use this word as an insult, neither would I apply it for a woman. It is only used for man in the UK, but as far as I know there are some people who call women that way in the States. In any case, if used as an insult, it's very very rude. As for fucker, I consider it even more insulting but probably it isn't.
Calling a man a "cunt" seems to me like such a British thing to do. I rarely, if ever, hear a guy being called that here. Once when I was at a public place that escapes me right now, a British sounding guy called his friend a "fucking cunt" and several young women within earshot whipped right around and chewed him out for using that word. I think to many of us American women, "cunt" is a much more offensive word than "fuck".
Anyway, for me, hearing a woman with power being called a "bitch" or "cunt" for behaving in a way no different from her male colleagues gets my dander up. I also dislike when a woman of a certain age is called a "hag" simply because she has allowed her face to wrinkle.
Benjamin [inactive]
To be honest, I can't say that I view any specific words particularly offensive. I hear the sorts of words mentioned in this thread all the time — I really wouldn't bat an eyelid if I heard someone used the word cunt, let alone fuck. Most of the time when such words are used here, there is no real intention to offend people.
Elaine
Benjamin wrote:
To be honest, I can't say that I view any specific words particularly offensive. I hear the sorts of words mentioned in this thread all the time — I really wouldn't bat an eyelid if I heard someone used the word cunt, let alone fuck. Most of the time when such words are used here, there is no real intention to offend people.
Normally, I'm not one to get easily offended by vulgar language, however there is a time and place for it. If for instance I'm riding in a crowded bus, or dining in a public place, especially when children are present, and the people near me are chatting loudly and every other word is fuck, shit, bitch, chinga, pinche, cabrón... then that's when I take offense, because it shows a lack of respect for others, and a total disregard for propriety. And unfortunately, this seems to be the case with today's youth.
Uriel
Cunt is always reserved for women in the US; calling a man that would probably just get you an odd look here.
I can recall a time when a coworker screamed "bitch!" at me when I brushed her off during an emergency, and I became immediately enraged at her and seriously wanted to pop her one, emergency or no. I was surprised at the suddenness and intensity of my anger, in fact. Nor did I ever forgive her afterwards, even though it was plain that she had just lost her head in the excitement. Something similar happened with another coworker who called me a "kiss ass" -- it was all over from that moment on.
I think it may have been more that these words were yelled in real anger by people I didn't like much during an argument than the actual terminology, though.
Loic
On the contrary, I seldom hear any woman being called a cunt, presumably because it'd be utterly pointless to do so. Calling a man a cunt is to cast aspersions on his masculinity, I suppose, implying that he is weak and pusillanimous.
Or I could be wrong. I have never used that word before.
The sort of cutting words which one learns in life is probably exposed to us in school. After all, the period of our schooldays is an intense time, full of creating friendships, cutting alliances and cultivating animosities that at that time seem like the most important thing in the world. So calling someone a 'wanker' can paradoxically be an affirmation of good ties or a start of a war. In my school, a wanker was also someone who swotted intensely and was only interested in getting good grades; in other words, the sort of social misfits the cool crowds sensibly avoid at all costs.
What I find quite astonishing is how 'bastard' no longer has the ability to hurt someone when it was once considered to be a below-the-belt blow when hurled on someone. It is a good thing though as we can hopefully consider this to be a sign of progress that, while in the past one of the worst things one person could insinuate to the other was illegitimate birth, nowadays, with fluid relationships and families constantly falling apart, this is no longer likely to hurt, let alone break any bones.
Liz
Uriel wrote:
Cunt is always reserved for women in the US; calling a man that would probably just get you an odd look here.
I've never ever heard it being used for women. It's good to know what to expect in the US... Frankly, I would be shocked if I were called a 'cunt'. I would probably not realise that it was meant for me - I would look around, searching for men in my vicinity.
Elaine
Loic wrote:
On the contrary, I seldom hear any woman being called a cunt, presumably because it'd be utterly pointless to do so. Calling a man a cunt is to cast aspersions on his masculinity, I suppose, implying that he is weak and pusillanimous.
Or I could be wrong. I have never used that word before.
Very interesting. I didn't know that there was such a difference in usage between Anglophobe countries. In the US and perhaps in Canada, calling a woman a cunt is tantamount to calling her a "raving, psycho bitch" but with a much more venomous and misogynistic contextual meaning, which is why we American women find the term extremely insulting. From what I gather from your comments, in the UK and other commonwealth countries, calling a guy a cunt is similar to calling him a "pussy", which is probably why British guys nonchalantly call their best mates that.
Tiffany
Actually the word cunt to me is more degrading than that - to me it symbolizes a mostly worthless dirty whore, useful for only one thing...
Uriel
I've only had occasion to use it once, and I was really, REALLY mad when I did it -- but it was aimed at another girl, and it definitely had the intended effect.
Elaine's right, though -- pussy would be the way that Americans denigrate a male, and would be equivalent to how others use "cunt". And of course, it's another word for female genitalia, so I guess it's fitting, although interesting that we settled on a different term to do the same job. It can also be used between male friends in a joking way. It's less likely to be applied to women, but it can be, in the sense of being a wimp. You just don't hear it quite as often.
KSa
In Polish we have the word which is pronounced exactly the same as "cunt". It is spelled "kant" and it has several meanings: crease, edge, swindle...
Rio
To weigh in on the c-word argument, I've never heard it used against a female only against men. Its definitely to be used against someone in the most extreme cases, probably because when you say it, it has that "khhhhh" vitriol about it and it only refers to someone when they are worse than an a***hole[/code]
Rio
To weigh in on the c-word argument, I've never heard it used against a female, only against men. It would be odd to call a woman that, bit like how a few years it was odd to call a man a "bitch" (but seems to be more common now when you want to emasculate a man). Its definitely to be used against men in the most extreme cases, probably because when you say it, it has that "khhhhh" vitriol about it and it only refers to someone when they are worse than an a***hole
Frankly, I would be shocked if I were called a 'cunt'. I would probably not realise that it was meant for me - I would look around, searching for men in my vicinity.